Movies in MO

Werewolves – December 6, 2024

Two scientists try to stop a mutation that turns people into werewolves after being touched by a super-moon the year before.

The horror genre has seen a lot of below-average films, but “Werewolves” manages to set a new standard for cinematic disappointment. This movie is a masterclass in how not to create a werewolf story, combining a stupid plot, horrible acting, and technical incompetence into one memorably awful experience. The idea of a supermoon that transforms a billion people into werewolves overnight is another genuinely absurd premise that will probably invalidate any semblance of verisimilitude. Somehow, society remains mostly unchanged and unprepared. This is the simple contradiction on which the movie sets its entire tone of narrative incoherence. The story centers on Wesley Marshall (Frank Grillo), a stereotypical action hero type leading a microscopic team of researchers preparing for the supermoon’s return. Their groundbreaking solution? A laughable substance called “moonscreen” – a name so ridiculous it sounds like a parody of scientific innovation. As expected, this miraculous prevention method fails spectacularly, unleashing exactly the chaos it was meant to prevent. Acting in “Werewolves” reaches depths of awfulness that are almost impressive in their consistency. Frank Grillo phones in yet another generic action-hero performance, seemingly interchangeable with his roles in countless other B-movies. The supporting cast is equally burdened with a script so poorly written that it seems to sabotage their efforts. The girl is extremely cute, and she gives her line so woodenly and awkwardly that she really becomes a painful focal point. Even her on-screen mother is equally cringe-generating, turning even the most emotional sequences into unintended comic episodes. Lou Diamond Phillips is reduced to expository lines that border almost on self-parody, such is the state of the material he has to work with. Technically, the film is a disaster. The director’s obsession with lens flares makes some of the most intense moments look more like visual noise than the actual action. These giant, distracting glares often completely obscure what is happening on-screen, destroying what could have been an exciting scene and instead just makes it incomprehensible. The werewolf effects are just as disappointing; instead of actual terrifying creatures, the visual effects crew has concocted ones so lame that they tend to elicit laughter rather than fear. Compare this to groundbreaking werewolf films like “An American Werewolf in London” or “The Howling” from 1981, and the inadequacy becomes painfully clear. The movie’s world-building collapses under the slightest scrutiny. A billion people transform into werewolves, yet the world looks exactly the same. The “global rapid response team” tasked with managing this apocalyptic event consists of fewer people than a small office meeting. A lone scientist apparently holds a press conference to announce that less than a dozen people will combat a worldwide werewolf threat – a scenario so ridiculous it defies explanation. Nothing in “Werewolves” comes as a surprise. Character deaths are telegraphed miles in advance, plot twists can be seen coming from another zip code, and the supposed “shocking” moments are nowhere to be seen. The film relies on every horror and action movie cliché, recycling tired tropes without a hint of originality or self-awareness. What makes “Werewolves” truly frustrating is its squandered potential. The entire premise could have had the makings of such a fascinating draw – a worldwide werewolf event with scientific intrigue and horror. Instead, the filmmakers offer up something so mindlessly lazy and uninspired that it feels like a first draft hastily cobbled together, wrongly sent on to production. “Werewolves” ceases to be a bad movie – it becomes a lesson in the lowest depths of horror filmmaking. It fails as a horror film, as an action movie, and as a coherent piece of storytelling. The only thing supernatural about this film is how spectacularly it manages to miss every single mark. For werewolf enthusiasts and horror fans, this movie offers nothing but frustration. Save your time and money. Revisit the classics or find a film that actually respects its audience’s intelligence and the genre’s potential. Painful reminder: not all monsters are on the screen, but some are responsible for making the movie.

OUR RATING – A LOW-BUDGET 2

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