Movies in MO

Slender Man – August 10th, 2018

Slender Man Blu-Ray
Slender Man DVD

WHAT’S IT ABOUT

Small-town best friends Hallie, Chloe, Wren, and Katie go online to try and conjure up the Slender Man — a tall, thin, horrifying figure whose face has no discernible features. Two weeks later, Katie mysteriously disappears during a class trip to a historic graveyard. Determined to find her, the girls soon suspect that the legend of the Slender Man may be all too real.

MOVIESinMO REVIEW

This is yet another film trying to capitalize off of the Millennial generation by using the internet and social media to create a new “killer.” Just saying Slender Man sound stupidly awkward. In the movie, his introduction and creation as a threat seemed more like a forced conversation than the normal “Hey, what’s going on with you today.” It starts with four high school girls searching the internet for proof of Slender Man and ways to make him appear. In less than ten minutes, the girls were able to look him up online, get all the information they needed, recreate the incantation, and fear for their lives for the duration of the film. There are so many problems with this it amazes me that this movie was ever produced. The first, and main issue, is I didn’t care about any of the characters. There was a half-assed attempt to make you care about them, but that fell short. After that one and only attempt, the girls had already read the spell and basically had the look of death until the movie ended. There were a few jump scene but immediately after something traumatic happened, they would slow it back down to nothing. I guess the producer thought we needed time to calm down. The second problem was the town and everybody in it. I have never been to Massachusetts, but I’m sure they have more personality than the ones in the film. When someone comes up missing, the entire country is notified, and the affected city is on high alert. In Slender Man, missing teens were met with “I guess they’re sick,” “they ran away” or “do you think we should say something?” My third annoyance was with the Slender Man. Besides the obvious irritation that this movie doesn’t know if it wants to be horror or a thriller, the actual Slender Man poses more questions than answers and continues to baffle the audience regarding his authenticity. Lastly, this movie should have never been made because there was an incident, May 30, 2014, in Southeastern Wisconsin were two 12-year-old females stabbed their classmate 19 times. They needed a blood sacrifice to appease the Slender Man, and by doing so, they would morph into mini-­monsters and live with him in a mansion in the forest. THAT would have been a better movie. But as it is this “based on a true story” was a waste of time, film, and money.

OUR RATING – STUPID LEGEND = STUPID MOVIE 2

DVD/BLU-RAY/DIGITAL

  • Genre – Horror
  • Street date
  • Digital – October 19th, 2018
  • DVD/Blu-Ray – October 30th 2018
  • Video – 1080p
  • Screen size – 2.39:1
  • Sound – English: DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1, French: DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1
  • Portuguese: DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1, Spanish: Dolby Digital 5.1
  • Thai: Dolby Digital 5.1
  • Subtitles – English SDH, French, Portuguese, Vietnamese, Korean, Mandarin Chinese, Indonesian, Thai, and Spanish

Extras

  • Summoning Slender Man: Meet the Cast – featurette
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